


A Face to Remember

by CMi (CmiMiu)



Series: BangHim [1]
Category: B.A.P
Genre: Adorable, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Bromance, Bromance to Romance, Face blindness, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Jongup is a little shit, Kid Jongup, M/M, Meet-Cute, Neighbors, Platonic JongLo, Prosopagnosia, Romance, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Strangers to Lovers, Trust, banghim, cuteness, daejae - Freeform, kid Zelo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 03:43:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12572976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CmiMiu/pseuds/CMi
Summary: Yongguk falls in love, all the time, with a man he's never seen before.





	A Face to Remember

**Author's Note:**

> Fair warning everyone!
> 
> Please keep in mind that this story contains certain rates themes or ideas. I will not elaborate upon them but readers discretion is advised. I do not want to trigger anyone so please remember that if you choose to read the story, it's all on you.
> 
>  
> 
> With that said, please enjoy~~~

Yongguk falls in love, all the time, with a man he's never seen before.

 

***

 

If you had asked Yongguk what his first impression of Himchan was he’d tell you, he thought the man annoying at first. There was a simple reason to it; a very plausible one at that.

 

Himchan was a fashionista in every sense of the word. His clothes never had a set pattern or style. The man went through fashion trends like a mathematician through the multiplication table. And Himchan never had a particular scent about him. Ever. One day he could be wearing BVLGari and the next a local made musk perfume. Another excruciatingly aggravating trait the man carried was his constant need to ‘update’ his hairstyle.

 

Now, all those things are normal if you are a normal person living in the normal world your mind creates for you. But Yongguk, as you all must have guessed, wasn’t normal. He was a producer who had recently graduated from Korea Arts University and bought a new apartment in the heart of Seoul. He had only recently moved, in fact. And he had prosopagnosia. Which, in simple words, means face blindness.

 

As you all must’ve guessed, his disorder had really shaped him into the hermit he’d always thought he was destined to be. And Yongguk was perfectly fine with spending the rest of his life not recognising people or making friends or having to explain to people why they shouldn’t be offended if doesn’t remember them. He was blissfully satisfied in the knowledge that the only other human he'd have to care about in the rest of his life was his brother, Youngjae.

 

Alas! Nothing ever works out in his favor. And when Himchan moves next door to his apartment, Yongguk resigns himself to the inevitable rejection he’s faced one too many times and decides to simply keep his distance to save his heart from another breakage.

 

But, like I said, nothing ever works out in his favour, so naturally Yongguk falls in love with the man instead.

 

***

 

Yongguk is idyly standing in the elevator, never looking up from his IPad, when the the ding of the vessel makes him groan slightly and reach into his pockets to shove his earphones in his ears. He’s not exactly antisocial; he is, however, highly against talking to someone who randomly appears in front of him. Mainly because if they turn out to be someone Yongguk is supposed to know it will lead to an hour long explanation of “I’m sorry I didn’t recognise you. You changed your hairstyle and that made you face unrecognisable.”

 

He’s promptly staring at his device when the rich scent of roses and amber fills his nostrils. And Yongguk just has look up.

 

The first thing he notices is the hair color. Cherry red. The man is carrying a suitcase in his right hand and a duffel bag in his left. He too, has earphones in but only in his left ear. He’s frowning at his cellphone and looking particularly perturbed by something on the screen.

 

And it’s not that the man is so beautiful that Yongguk would surely remember his face. He doesn’t remember any kind of face, at all. But Yongguk just knows that this man is a stranger. Because usually it’s a little hard to tell if someone is a stranger or an acquaintance until they look you in the eye. But this man is surely a stranger. And Yongguk finds it odd that he wants to initiate a conversation with the man.

 

Because he is handsome. He is handsome and, dare Yongguk say, he’s probably the most handsome man he’s seen in his entire life. Not that he’d remember, but still! With deep brown eyes, set into cattish sockets. And an overbite that pushes his bottom lip out when he’s frowning, the man looks like a sculpture an aesthete would sculpt.

 

“You just moved?” he asks the man despite ever instinct in his body begging him not to.

 

The man, then looks up and smiles. And Oh! His smile. He has dimples; not in his cheeks but just below his eyes. Dips that appear deeper the more he smiles. He's wearing a suit but that doesn't surprise him because the apartment complex he lives in houses many executives and CEOs. The man, extends a hand out to him and when Yongguk holds his hands they’re nothing special. Soft, yes. But, other than that, Yongguk doesn’t think he’s found any recognisable traits in the man, other than his smile.

 

“Yes. I’m Himchan” the man in front of him says and Yongguk wishes, for the first time in a long time, that the next time they meet, he will remember him.

 

“I’m Yongguk.”

 

*

 

Yongguk is busy eating his ramyun when the doorbell rings. He groans but gets to his feet to answer the door nonetheless. Of course the face that greets him is brand new and Yongguk maintains a stoic expression when he speaks, “Yes?”

 

The man in front of him frowns, smiling a little but looking highly uncomfortable. “Umm…” He begins. And the voice doesn't register at all in his cranium. He thinks he might've heard it once, but not enough to be sure of who's standing in front of him.

 

“Look.” He begins, not wanting to be rude but frustrated with himself. “I don't know who you are so just say your name or what you want.”

 

The man looks completely shell-shocked. Yongguk is inclined to believe it's someone he knows, but keeps his words to himself in case he's wrong and it's just a stranger. He then tries to find quirks, as he calls them, in the person in front of him. Special traits that might give him any clue of who he might be.

 

He's wearing a grey hoodie and has his hair hidden under the hood. He's also wearing a pair of ugly green pyjamas and smells like baby powder. Yongguk racks his brain for anyone who would fit the description but comes up empty handed. Just as he's about to ask again, though, the man introduces himself. Again.

 

“I usually don't have to introduce myself twice in the same day,” His voice holds a cheekiness to it. One that Yoongi doesn't exactly despise. “But, whatever. I'm Himchan. Your new neighbor.”

 

And Yongguk can feel something bubble in his chest when Himchan simply states it like it's the first time they've met. That he doesn't make it sound like a question, as if blaming Yongguk for forgetting.

 

“I'm so sorry.” Yongguk flusters opening the door wider and moving a little out of way welcoming Himchan to his home. When Himchan doesn’t make to enter he ruffles his hair awkwardly and mutters under his breath. “I… c- couldn’t recognise you.”

 

At that Himchan chuckles and enters at last. As he enters, Yongguk watches the man eye his apartment appreciatively and thanks the Heavens for his penchant for cleanliness. Yongguk watches Himchan stop right in the middle of his apartment and regard him with interest. He gulps at the gaze the other man sends his way. “We met like five minutes ago. And you even offered to help me with my luggage.” He muses, smirking at Yongguk. “People usually tend to remember me for days after they’ve met me, you know.” When Yongguk doesn’t respond, only looking highly embarrassed, Himchan continues, “it’s not exactly that hard to forget a pretty face like mine, you see.”

 

There’s that cheekiness in his voice again. That hint of childish humor lingering in a raspy, almost after-sex, voice. Yongguk has to bite his lips before he finally speaks. “It’s actually harder to remember pretty faces.” He shrugs lamely at that, walking back to his abandoned ramyun cup.

 

“I’m not sure I follow,” Himchan wonders out loud taking a seat in the arm chair opposite to Yongguk’s. It’s odd, the familiarity with which Himchan just seats himself in his apartment, uninvited, unabashed. But, Yongguk doesn’t mind. He thinks he likes it. He’s not sure, actually.

 

Yongguk peaks up from his cup to look at a very interested Himchan. The man’s eyes are raised in curiosity, and his lips are pouting very slightly. Slurping in the last of his noodles before stealing his eyes from that unnerving gaze again, Yongguk mutters around the broth left. “I have, prosopagnosia, so… it’s hard for me to remember faces.”

 

Himchan looks utterly bewildered at the announcement, and Yongguk internally groans at his life’s decisions. He’s already preparing himself mentally to be called a ‘weirdo’ or to be politely swept under the ‘acquaintance that shall never be more’ waste bin. And no matter how many times this happens, Yongguk still feels bad for losing a potential friend.

 

But, when Yongguk looks up at Himchan, the man looks completely unfazed. The hints of confusion still linger in his eyes but other than that, Himchan looks almost inquisitively at Yongguk as he asks, “is that some kind of disorder.”

 

And his words aren’t rude. He doesn’t mean to poke fun at Yongguk. The man can clearly see in his eyes that Himchan is genuinely just curious. So, Yongguk nods and mutters yet again, “yeah. It’s like face blindness.”

 

“So, you can’t see me right now?” Is Himchan’s query. And the fact that he sounds highly distressed by the declaration has Yongguk guffawing. A gummy smile breaks upon his lips as he watches Himchan lament over Yongguk’s apparent disability to see him.  He shakes his head a ‘no’ and sets the ramyun cup back on the coffee table.

 

“I can see you just fine,” he explains, mellowing down a little. “I just can’t remember you afterwards. It’s like watching the sunset.” He recounts the same explanation he’s given a million times before. “I can see the colors just fine but when I look away I won’t be able to pinpoint exactly where the colors were or what colors or how the pattern in the sky was.”

 

“Ah~” comes Himchan highly eloquent reply. His eyes shining with the knowledge. Yongguk’s watches carefully, how Himchan’s lips form an uneven ‘O’ as he leans his elbows on his knees. He observes the way Himchan’s one eye blinks as he flips his hair out of his eyes. “So it’s like a short-term memory loss kind of thing, except only with faces?”

 

Yongguk tips his head sideways wondering if that’s what it is before shaking his head again. “It’s more like a permanent memory reset for faces, actually.”

 

“So how do you remember people? Like friends or family and stuff?” The other man sounds both intrigued and anxious at Yongguk’s plight.

 

The other man pulls his legs under his feet and stares at the ceiling as he wanders out to himself, “it takes time, but I try to remember quirks.”

 

“Quirks?”

 

Yongguk looks back at Himchan to find the man entirely invested in his words. Hanging off every syllable. And he finds this odd because most people don’t even stick around to ask how his disorder even works. A rye smile finds its way onto his lips as he continues. “Yeah, like…” He scours his mind for an example, snapping his fingers when his brother comes to mind. “Like, with my brother Youngjae. He has really prominent cheekbones and has a birthmark between his shoulders and neck. And his voice is a baritone but he always speaks in a high tenor.”

 

By the time he’s done explaining, Himchan’s eyes are littering shimmering with question and he’s exclaiming a wondrous, “woah~”

 

“Yeah.” Yongguk once again rubs the back of his neck, embarrassed with himself and ready to bid a new friend Goodbye for ever. “It’s… dumb.”

 

A minute passes like that. With Himchan mulling over Yongguk’s words and Yongguk watching the man’s frown increasing with every second. He’s this close to actually apologizing for throwing this information at him but Himchan cuts him off.

 

“Are you gonna try and find a quirk in me too, then?”

 

Yongguk stares at the man then. A childish grin on his face, Himchan looks barely eighteen as he leans further on his knees like a kitten. There’s a hint of challenge in the man’s tone and Yongguk doesn’t know what to make of that.

 

“I… guess?” He shrugs in reply. Unsure if that’s the correct answer to the question.

 

Himchan then leans away and pushes his hand out in front of himself calling for a handshake. Yongguk watches the hand offered to him with slight amusement but rolls his eyes and takes it nonetheless.

 

And then Himchan speaks and Yongguk thinks he’s made a friend. “Challenge accepted.”

 

*****

 

The next time Yongguk meets Himchan is three days later when he’s on his way to the coffee shop downtown. He’d just gotten back from the music store two blocks away and wanted to enjoy his new headphones with a nice cup of warm mocha. He’s blissfully making his way to his usual coffee shop when a voice yells out to him.

 

The brunette turns around on the sidewalk to look for anyone who looks even remotely familiar, but none of the faces that stare back at him ring a bell. He’s just about to turn away and shove the incident as an accident when a man, pink cheeks and a fluffy jacket clad waves at him. With a tentative smile, Yongguk waves back at the man who’s speedily racing towards him from across the street. Disregarding all traffic rules, much to Yongguk’s displeasure - he’s a stickler for rules, you see.

 

“Hey there!” The man huffs as he reaches him. He’s wearing a bright pink fur jacket with corduroy jeans and pink ear muffs to match his attire. A horridly bright beanie of the same color scheme sits on his head, hiding away his hair. His gloves, pink again, are attached to each other by a string that runs around the nape of his neck. A pleasant scent of freshly made melon buns wafts from the person’s being. His nose is the color of a ripened peach and and it makes him look like a child, Yongguk remarks.

 

“... Hi.” Yongguk frowns. He knows he’s heard that voice somewhere, but can’t put a finger on it. That smile is familiar too. He doesn’t really care that he’s probably squinting madly at the man right now, because Yongguk can almost put a name to the face. “Yoseob?” He is wearing the same pink jacket that Yoseob has supported for almost two years. So, Yongguk's takes his chance with the name.

 

The man, with dimples underneath his eyes, chuckles and almost bends over from the effort of not laughing out too loud. “It’s Himchan, Bang Yongguk!” He sounds painfully unoffended with Yongguk’s mistake. Actually, he sounds like he was expecting that.

 

His cheeks turn red. Yongguk doesn’t have to look into a mirror to know that he’s redder than Snow White's apple right now. Much to his dismay, Himchan pats his back and exclaims to him as he pulls him to the coffee store. “No need to turn red, my friend. It’ll take time to come up with my quirks.” He winks at him and Yongguk admits to himself that he might be feeling a couple of butterflies in his stomach. “You’re here for coffee, right?”

 

“Yeah. How’d you know?” Yongguk raises an eye at the man.

 

Himchan, gasping in delight at the shop’s air conditioner that showers them with warmth as soon as they enter it, smiles at Yongguk and explains in a Are-You-Dumb way, “you were walking into the shop when I called you from across the street, my friend.”

 

My Friend. The words echo in Yongguk’s mind. Why does he keep calling me that!? It’s the second time he’s called him that, and Yongguk can not put this off as a polite greeting anymore.

 

“What about you, then?” He shoots back instead, waving at Jieun, a cashier, as they are walking to a table near the window. When he looks back at Himchan, the man is staring between him and Jieun. Curiosity, bright in his eyes. Yongguk then rolls his eyes and nods his head towards Jieun and explains, “she always stands at counter number 2 and is always wearing that bass clef locket. It’s her mother's.”

 

Like watching an orchestra performance end, Himchan’s eyes twinkle at the explanation. “You are honestly so cool, Bang! How do you even remember all this!?” Patting his shoulders appreciatively he turns his attention to the menu card on the table. “What are you having, by the way?”

 

Only just emerging from the shock of being called ‘cool’ for being a weirdo who ‘perverts on every person he meets’ Yongguk shakes his head and clears his throat. “I- I’m having a mocha. Really wanted something sweet.”

 

“Cool,” Himchan smiles, standing as he makes his way to the counter, “I’ll order for us. Coffee’s on me.”

 

Before he can even refused the act of kindness, Himchan is gone and Yongguk sits back staring at the menu card in front of him. He’s never had anyone offer to buy him a coffee so he’s not aware of the society’s norms of the correct behavior in the situation. But Youngjae had always told him to accept people’s offer to buy you food because that usually means they want to be friends. So Yongguk will take his chances.

 

Because, for some inexplicably unknown reason, he wants to be friends with Himchan.

 

He’s sitting at the table waiting for Himchan to come with the coffee as he tests his new Beats, nodding off to a low tune on his headphones, when a man edges into the seat opposite to him. He raises his eyes at the man and tries to remember if he’s seen him somewhere. The man, however has an entirely unrecognizable visage and Yongguk rolls his eyes to just shoot him a query.

 

“I’m sorry I don’t recognise you.” His voice, irritated. But he’s not necessarily irritated by the man; it’s himself he’s irritated with.

 

The man looks at him in wonder, eyes sparkling. Yongguk thinks he might’ve seen that sparkle somewhere before but can’t put his finger on it. With a cry of amazement that man exclaims excitedly, “I leave you to order coffee and suddenly I’m a thing of the past?”

 

“Himchan?” Yongguk asks incredulous. He takes in the man’s attire; white high-neck sweater and no pink jacket. Even the peach blush of his cheeks is gone. “What happened to your jacket? And gloves and earmuffs?” He eyes the man's blond hair and wonders curiously, “Did you dye you hair again?”

 

At his words, a smirk graces the man's face and Yongguk is, for the second time that day, bedazzled by the man's eye smile. “So that's my quirk?” He inquires like an excited little child being offered candy a day before Halloween. “You recognise me by my clothes?”

 

Yoongi takes in the man's appearance, the twinkle in his eyes, and rolls his eyes to brush off the tumbling inside his chest. “That's how I recognised you today. We haven't met enough times for me to be able to gauge your fashion sense. Or come up with another quirk.”

 

The cherry haired man smirks at that and sipping on his Americano states in an obnoxiously, seductive manner, “guess who's never sticking to a fashion style from today onwards?”

 

Yongguk wants to be annoyed by the man's antics, but he finds himself falling into his eyes instead.

 

*****

 

“When did you move in, then?” Youngjae asks Himchan while the man next to him is digging into the meatloaf the elder had brought over for Yongguk to taste. Yongguk’s brother sends a side glance towards the man ingesting the meal like it’s his last and rolls his eyes, waving towards him airly. “Ignore Daehyun. He has a tendency to act like a starved prisoner in the presence of meat loaf.” In an afterthought he adds bitingly. “Or cake. Or stews. Or anything edible, really.” Daehyun looks completely uninterested in anything the man is saying as he continues eating ‘Yongguk’s’ dinner.

 

Yongguk thinks this meeting with his brother and his boyfriend might be the flame to the torch that might drive Himchan away from him. He has already mentally planned his next week's schedule wherein he is planning on avoiding any place Himchan might go. But, yet again, Himchan surprises him when he smiles that smile of his. The dimpled one.

 

“I’m glad he liked it.” He grins sitting down next to Daehyun and slicing a side of the meatloaf into a plate. He then plucks out a fork and knife from the kitchen counter and pushes the plate towards Yongguk as he continues, “And I actually moved here about three weeks ago.”

 

“Interesting…” Youngjae mutters under his breath. Watching with raised eyes how Himchan makes himself completely at home in Yongguk’s apartment. Offering him a plate as well. “What do you do?”

 

Himchan looks up from his forkful and grins as he answers, “oh! I’m a part time music conductor in the Korean Orchestra Community.” He continues to take a bite of his food and moans at the taste of his own cooking. Then points towards Yongguk’s untouched plate, “try it Bang! You’ll love it.”

 

“Bang..?” Youngjae whispers under his breath as he turns to stare daggers into Yongguk’s skull. Yongguk gulps but doesn’t look into those questioning eyes. This is the beginning of the end he tells himself as he watches the Youngjae click into his ‘Interrogation Mode’. “Have you graduated from college?”

 

The man who the question was directed to raises his eyes at the sudden inquiry and nods his head slowly as he smirks. “Of course I have graduated college. You think they let just anyone into the Korean Orchestra Community?” With a proud smile hanging of his lips he elaborates, “I have a Master's degree in Classical Music and Instruments.”

 

“Then why are you working part time?”

 

Daehyun stops eating at that, staring between the two. It’s not the question that makes the atmosphere turn cold. It’s Youngjae’s tone. Accusing and sharp. Himchan eyes him carefully as he replies, putting his cutlery down for the conversation. “I am not sure it’s the direction I want to take my career into.”

 

“So you’re indecisive?” Youngjae scoffs.

 

The other man raises an eye at that. “I guess you could say that?”

 

He watches Daehyun subtly patting Youngjae’s knees muttering something to his boyfriend under his breath.

 

Youngjae looks at Yongguk, who looks more bored than embarrassed by his brother’s behaviour and continues his questions. “How many times have you been to Yongguk’s apartment since you moved here?”

 

Clearly taken aback by the question, Himchan lets surprise color his features and scoffs, leaning his elbows on the counter. “Exactly why do I need to tell you that?”

 

“Because Yongguk’s my brother and I need to know what goes around in his life.” Comes Youngjae’s speedy reply.

 

“I failed to see how you being his brother gives you right to know anything about his life that he hasn’t explicitly told you about.”

 

Youngjae smiles deviously at Himchan’s response and folds his arms across his chest. “Well, you should thank me for educating you about these things then.”

 

Daehyun, Himchan watches the other man push his plate away, is no longer being subtle with his mumblings and groans as he turns Youngjae around in his chair. “Could you stop? He’s Yongguk’s friend and you are scaring him away.”

 

“I wouldn’t say he’s scaring me,” Himchan pipes up. Carelessly blowing at the meal set in front of him, in all nonchalance, Himchan states rather blatantly. “More like he’s annoying me.”

 

“Funny.” Youngjae scowls. “That’s kinda how I feel when a random stranger just enters my brother’s apartment at 10 in the night with meatloaf.”

 

Yongguk stares bored between his brother and his new ‘Hot’ neighbor. He then shares an eye roll with Daehyun, shrugs, and continues eating. Watching in utter delight how Himchan refuses to back down in front of Youngjae.

 

“Really?” Himchan feigns interest, now fully turning towards Youngjae. Shoulders squared up. His hands fisted. “Wow! You must be the really out of it if you think me visiting my friend's place at 10 is annoying.”

 

“Friend!?” Youngjae gawks. He stares at Yongguk, who's smirking into his mouthful, and then scoffs flipping his hair with a growl. “You are not his friend. Since when did you even become friend!? You've known each other for three weeks!”

 

Never blinking his eyes at Youngjae's wild gestures, Himchan leans into his chair and lazily iterates. “We've been friends for three weeks.”

 

Youngjae takes in a huge gulp of air and just when he looks like he's going to go off into another rant, Yongguk looks at him. “He's my friend, Youngjae.” His voice firm. Tone holding authority. “Let it go.”

 

Like a balloon being released of its tie, Youngjae deflates comically into Daehyun's chest. The other man, holding his loosely when he falls into his embrace.

 

“So…” Daehyun begins and Yongguk smiles thankfully at the man. “Are you dating someone?”

 

Scratch that! Yongguk is NOT thankful towards Daehyun. He does NOT need to know this! He's being attacked with unwanted information about his possible crush’s love life!

 

“No, I'm flying solo for now.” Comes Himchan’s reply.

 

Did he say he isn't thankful? Yongguk is in actuality very, very thankful for Daehyun's existence.

 

*****

 

It’s a Saturday and Himchan is back at his apartment. Yongguk has never had so many guests at one time but for some reason, he’s enjoying himself. And by, so many, I mean one too many.

 

They are all scattered on the floor watching a cartoon because Youngjae insisted on watching Ultraman. Daehyun is beside his boyfriend, gobbling down Youngjae’s food along with his own. Himchan is beside him talking to him about his next orchestral concert. And Yongguk thinks everything is going fine until Himchan suggests hanging out together.

 

“Hey!” The man beside him jerks his hand at the advertisement on the television. In an excited manner, he points at the movie promotion on screen and nudges Yongguk. “We should go watch a movie together. There’s a new theater that opened last month two blocks from here.”

 

A cold silence blankets them where Yongguk tries to hid under his cushion covers before Daehyun speaks. The embarrassment in his voice makes Yongguk cringe, “well, Yongguk can’t really watch movies and stuff…”

 

He trails off but Youngjae continues for him. Biting his lips as he turns sombre, “he forgets who’s playing what once they go off screen so we have to keep filling him in on which actor is playing which character.” His ears turns red and Youngjae looks morbidly ashamed of himself when he adds, “besides, Yongguk doesn’t enjoy movies that much. So… yeah.”

 

Yongguk can sense Himchan’s gaze burning his skull but he doesn’t look up. Keeping up the facade of nonchalance, the man continues eating the stew Youngjae had cooked. He’s on his second spoonful when Himchan speaks again, “let’s go watch that movie.” His hand is on Yongguk’s knee, making him look up into those cat-like eyes that Yongguk could swear sparkle. Himchan pats his knee and with a dimple smile, warmly states, “I’ll fill you in every time you forget who’s who.”

 

Yongguk nods his head in affirmation and they set up a date.

 

It’s when they’re leaving for the night when Yongguk hears it. He doesn’t mean to eavesdrop on their conversation but Yongguk had been in the kitchen when he’d heard Youngjae had call Himchan to stop before he exited his apartment.  

 

He’s standing at the kitchen counter, completely still, trying to desperately hear what the two have to talk about. Well aware of the animosity for each other.

 

“You’ll get tired.” Youngjae says. And Yongguk already knows what Youngjae means about this. He grits his teeth but doesn’t move. Youngjae sighs and Yongguk can hear the fatigue in his brother’s lungs. Knows that he’s the reason for it. “It’s not easy being his friend. Having coffee together or bringing each other meat loaf on Saturdays is as far as it goes.”

 

There’s a bitterness that fills his veins at his brother’s words. Yongguk frowns at the words that tumble out of Youngjae’s mouth. But he doesn’t make to move as he continues to listen. “What’s that supposed to be?” Himchan’s voice rings through the apartment walls. He sounds angry. Annoyed. “Is that a warning? Threat?”

 

“It’s an advice.” Youngjae replies and the weight of his words dawns upon Yongguk. He’s a burden and despite hating Himchan as much as he does, Youngjae still wants to save the man from it. A bittersweet feeling of remorse settles into his guts. “I won’t stop you from going to the movies together. I know I’m not allowed to.” He heaves a sigh. “But I want you to know it won’t be easy. It might sound like an easy to handle illness but it isn’t. I’ve been with him his entire life. It’s not just movies. It’s everything.”

 

Yongguk can hear Himchan squint his eyes at his brother, despite not seeing him, when Himchan mumbles accusingly. “What are you getting at?”

 

Another sigh leaves Youngjae’s lips that freezes Yongguk’s heart. “You think you can handle it but half an hour into the movie you’ll get tired of repeating names to him. If you pull through that, you for sure won’t want to go to another movie together. While waiting in the coffee line, he’ll forget what you look like. By the time he get’s to you the coffee will have turned cold and you will have lost all interest in him. If you still choose to stick around, you’ll end up getting tired of him asking you who’s talking to him every time he meets someone he hasn’t seen in a long time. He’ll get lost on the way home and ask you to help him out. But when you go out to get him he’ll refuse to get into the car with you because he doesn’t recognise you. You’ll end up becoming a nanny rather than a friend.” His voice then turns croaky and Yongguk doesn’t have to look to know that Youngjae is tearing up as he speaks.

 

“I won-”

 

Youngjae cuts Himchan off and takes in a shaky breath as he explains, “it’s not that he’s never had the chance to make a friend.” There is remorse in his words. “They just… never stick around.”

 

Silence fills the apartment after that. Youngjae’s silent sobs are the only sounds he hears. And his heart bleeds for his brother, who cares too much. And it’s times like these, moments like these, that make Yongguk want to grab the younger in a tight embrace. He knows why Youngjae is so defensive, so protective of him. And times like these make him love his brother all the more.

 

Another while edges away when Himchan speaks again. Yongguk strains his ears to hear the man whisper. His voice sounding muffled. As if his mouth is covered by something. “I can keep repeating the character’s name for as long as he likes. I promise I won’t get irritated. Our coffee won’t ever get cold, because he won’t have to run the orders. I’ll have him always wait for me to bring the coffee to him.” Yongguk hears a ruffle of hair and quickly presumes that Youngjae is in Himchan’s embrace, with the elder caressing the younger’s locks as he shushes him. “He won’t have to keep asking me who he’s talking to because I’ll always let him know before he asks. And I promise to never let him get lost in the first place.”

 

“You’ll grow tired of him.” Youngjae’s voice sounds muffled and defeated.

 

“On the contrary,” Himchan chuckles. “I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of him.”

 

*****

 

“That’s Peter again.” Himchan whispers down his ears.

 

They are at the movie theater. Youngjae and Daehyun are with them. It’s been almost half an hour into the movie but Yongguk is still having a hard time remembering some of the characters. Though, he’s thankful that the movie has such a mixed casting.

 

“Who’s that guy?” Yongguk asks, pointing at the man on screen.

 

Himchan leans down his neck again and whispers, “it’s Toomes. The Vulture.”

 

“Ah~” comes Yongguk reply.  

 

He’s aware of the fact that he has broken his promise to himself of not asking Himchan too many questions during the movie. But this is the first movie he’s watch in almost three years. And it’s a good movie. And Himchan doesn’t seem to mind at all, so Yongguk is trying to enjoy himself.

 

Of course the same can’t be said about Himchan whose prime movie watching experience is being tarnished by two certain men sitting beside him.

 

*

 

They are exiting the movie theater and there’s a huge gummy smile resting on Yongguk’s lips. Youngjae’s lips are swollen and Daehyun is carrying a love bite on his left jaw.

 

“How was the movie?” Youngjae asks them as they are exiting the theater. “I, for one, loved it!”

 

Himchan rolls his eyes and scoffs exclaiming. “I couldn’t even watch the fucking movie. Was distracted the entire time. Worst movie watching experience of my life. Never again!”

 

The three others stop in their tracks. Frozen. Of course this would be the reaction, Yongguk tells himself. He was obviously distracting. Gosh! I should’ve never asked so many questions! He chides himself as he watches Youngjae fist his palms.

 

He starts walking again and Youngjae and Daehyun make to follow. The anger in Youngjae’s eyes seems to be leaking out of his pores. He’s just about to ram his knee into Himchan’s ass when Himchan turns to the trio hotly.

 

The man then points his fingers at Youngjae and Daehyun accusingly and exclaims, “next time, you two are NOT invited to our movie nights!”

 

Daehyun splutters at the accusing finger pointed at him. “Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

Himchan rolls his eyes and scoffs as he moves forward towards them. He then turns to Yongguk and almost whines as he complains to him. “They were making out during the entire movie. Right next to my ear!” The man then pouts, his lips jutting out all more as he continues complaining. “I was having so much fun one minute and the next I hear wet splotching sound. And when I look to my side, Daehyun is almost draped on Youngjae and he’s dry humping the guy like there’s no tomorrow!”

 

To their credit, both Youngjae and Daehyun are wearing matching looks of shame in their eyes. Their heads downcast and cheeks flared red. “W- well…” Youngjae coughs. Hiding behind Daehyun’s cringing back. “I- I told you to l- let me sit beside Yongguk. Didn’t I?”

 

To that, the elder scoffs and rests his arm over Yongguk’s shoulder, shaking his head deplorably at the pair. “I wanted to watch the movie with Yongguk! Why would I let you sit between him and I!?”

 

“D- Don’t make it sound worse than it is!” Daehyun howls racing towards Yongguk car, pulling Youngjae with him. Their red ears making them looking like two kids being in the act of petty shoplifting.

 

Himchan then starts pulling Yongguk towards the car as well. Arm still draped over the man’s shoulders. Muttering to him under his breath. “Let’s watch another movie next Saturday.” In an afterthought he adds. “Your brother and his boyfriend are not invited though.”

 

Yongguk can’t help but smile when he says, “agreed.”

 

*

 

Having dropped Youngjae and Daehyun home, Yongguk and Himchan are back at their apartment complex. They are in the elevator when Yongguk asks the question he’d been meaning to ask since the movie ended.

 

“You didn’t get tired watching the movie with me?”

 

Himchan looks up from his cellphone to shoot Yongguk with an eye smile. He shakes his head a no and mutters with a wink. “Not at all.” A second later he adds with finger gun, “it’ll take more than that to get rid of me.”

 

*****

 

Yongguk is carrying his music console up the stairs when a man appears beside him. The elevator in their complex is out of order and Yongguk is having the hardest time trying to drag the entire console up the stairs. His earphones in his ears, Yongguk ignores the man with metallic blue hair and continues to drag his case with him.

 

A second later a hand grabs on the console handle and Yongguk watches horrified how the man is stealing his prized possession. His very expensive prized possession. In a quick work of his dormant reflexes, Yongguk grabs the man’s legs as he racing up and pulls him back.

 

He grabs his mixer before it slides down the stairs and watches the man fall on his butt, his head crashing into stairwell. The man is wincing and Yongguk pulls out his earphones, staring at the blood beading onto the man’s forehead.

 

“What the heck, Bang!” the winces and Yongguk falls to his knee beside the man.

 

Horrified, Yongguk keeps muttering “I’m so fucking sorry, Himchan!” as he hovers above the injured man. He helps the man up and abandons his mixer on the stairwell guiding him to his apartment.

 

*

 

Himchan winces every time Yongguk's dabs his skin with alcohol. And despite himself, Yongguk winces back in sympathy, muttering a sorry every time. After several sorrys have been said  Himchan rolls his eyes and grabs Yongguk’s hand before he can further pat at it.

 

“Stop with the apologies, will you?” He smirks and flicks Yongguk’s nose, exclaiming, “you’ve already said you’re sorry twenty-six times.”

 

Guilt paints Yongguk’s face and he frowns again biting his lips. He gently jerks his hand away from Himchan’s grasp and sighs as he continues dabbing the blood away from the man’s forehead. “I- I just didn’t recognise you.” He heaves a sigh and peaks up at Himchan’s gaze. Looking away swiftly when their eyes meet. Thoroughly ashamed of himself. “You changed your hair color.” He adds lamely as if that might salvage his pride.

 

Himchan chuckles as he let’s Yongguk continue his first aid. He plays with his blue locks and nudges Yongguk. “I got it done yesterday. Pretty hot, huh?”

 

Yongguk looks at him like he’s a madman. His lips set in a permanent frown. “Aren’t you angry at me? Aren't you annoyed?”  
  
“No way!” Himchan chuckles but flinches when Yongguk doesn’t respond back with the same nonchalance. He sighs and pats Yongguk’s back as he begins. “It’s partly my fault too. I should’ve told you I’m Himchan before taking away your stuff from you.”

 

At that Yongguk shakes his head in denial. Face contorted in pain. Anger. “You shouldn’t have to introduce yourself every time we meet. That’s disrespectful to you.”

 

“No it’s not.” Himchan simply states. They sit staring at each other then. Eyes holding their gazes as their lips stand still. Yongguk watches a thin trickle of blood slide down Himchan’s face and guilt crashes around his stomach at the scar that will probably mar the beautiful face for days to come.

 

“I’m sorry Himchan.” Is all he manages to say as he looks away from the piercing gaze.

 

A man starts rubbing lazy circles into his shoulder. “You try to remember me. That’s what matters, Bang.” Himchan says and Yongguk can feel his heart catch fire at the man’s genuine care for him. “I keep changing my hair color. My fashion sense. Yesterday I was wearing a pokemon onesie but you still recognised me. A week before that I hadn’t even spoken to you but you approached me first, just by recognising my wallet. I always try to play around with you, trying to get you to recognise me but you never get mad at me for it.”

 

“But I can’t recognise you every time, can I?”

 

Himchan smiles and picks up the ointment from the first aid box, giving it to Yongguk. When the man wordlessly starts treating his wound again he continues, placing his head on his friend’s lap as he tiredly speaks. “You try so hard to remember me, despite all my antics. How could I possibly think of that as disrespectful?”

 

Himchan doesn’t see it, having closed his eyes soon after the confession, but a tear slides down Yongguk’s eyes at the man’s words.

 

*****

 

They are exchanging stories from their past when Daehyun snickers at Himchan. “Himchan,” he calls the man with an annoyingly evil smirk. “I found that 2015 Halloween party video of yours on instagram last night.”

 

Himchan’s eyes bulge at the information and Youngjae raises his eyes at his boyfriend, “what video?”

 

Daehyun, looking too much like an evil little imp, giggles as he takes in Himchan’s not-so-subtle gestures to stop talking. “I was just browsing through Himchan’s name on Instagram and saw him tagged in his video from 2015 and-”

 

Before he can continues Himchan launches himself at the younger man, slamming his hands on his mouth with a cry of “Shut up!”

  


Of course Youngjae only becomes all the more intrigued by their actions and turns to Yongguk with a raised eye. The two brother shrug and share a silent look with each other. Almost comically they both then pull Yongguk’s laptop closer and, ignoring the pair in front of them who are intensely invested in a wrestling match, quickly search up Himchan’s name on Instagram video posts.

 

It takes less than five minutes to search through Daehyun’s ‘Posts liked’ history - courtesy Youngjae who knows all of Daehyun’s passwords - to find the video.

 

Without warning they click the video and an image of Himchan standing next to a pole comes into video. Youngjae switches the volume up and Himchan and Daehyun dramatically on the floor, Himchan straddling Daehyun with his hands choking the younger.

 

Youngjae points to the man in the video, telling Yongguk “that’s Himchan.” ‘Sistar’s Alone’ starts playing and Himchan leaps to his feet to shut the device up but Daehyun grabs his legs making him fall before he can even move. And the video starts playing.

 

Himchan, in the video, looks completely wasted. He sways his hips to the music and starts grinding against the pole. Both Yongguk and Youngjae watch the scene unfold in front of them with horrified curiosity. They watch Himchan lick the pole before jump up and sliding down on it like a pole dancer, except he fails to stick the landing and falls on his butt. He then starts crying and the two brothers watch with morbid disgust how the man starts banging his legs on the floor crying for “Milky! Choco Milk!”

 

As the video comes to an end Himchan’s ears have turned red and he doesn’t make eye contact with anyone in the room. Yongguk fears they might’ve stepped the line and Daehyun too looses his hold on the elder because he’s stopped struggling now.

 

They are all waiting with bated breath for Himchan to explode but the man just looks back at Daehyun. “Youngjae.” A look of utter vengeance crosses his features and without so much as flinching, he looks Daehyun dead in the eyes and says, “Daehyun told me you have a panty kink and like to call him Oppa when he cums inside you.”

 

Daehyun stares like a deer stuck in headlights between Himchan and Youngjae. Yongguk discreetly moves away from Youngjae because that’s a little weird, even though he’s known his brother since they were in elementary school. Himchan smirks triumphantly at Daehyun watching in pure satisfaction when Youngjae gets to his feet and wordlessly pulls Daehyun up by his ears. The two don’t even say their goodbyes as they exit Yongguk’s apartment. Daehyun’s whispers of “I’m sorry, Baby. It slipped out” falling on dead ears.

 

As soon as Youngjae slams the door shut both Yongguk and Himchan look at each other before bursting into inconsolable guffaws. Yongguk is hitting the cushion of his couch and Himchan is draped all over the coffee table, giggling uncontrollably. By the time they sober down their sides are aching and they look like they’d just ran a marathon.

 

“Ah~” Yongguk breathes in heavily as he leans back into his couch, watching Himchan coughing through his laughter. “That was so not on my to-know list.”

 

Himchan then shrugs his shoulders and looks back at Yongguk with a smile clinging to his lips. “He had it coming, okay? Both of them did!”

 

The slightly older man shakes his head and tries to calm his erratic heart as he stares at the ceiling. Speaking quietly because he’s tired from laughing too hard. “I thought you got mad for a second there.”

 

The other can sense the question in Yongguk’s words. You’re mad, aren't you? Himchan knows that’s Yongguk indirect way of asking him that. “Why would I be mad, Bang?” He whispers back. Genuinely curious.

 

Yongguk shrugs as he tells him, “it’s an embarrassing thing. Most people don’t like sharing that part of them to others. It makes them vulnerable.”

 

Himchan ponders over his friend's words. Letting the words crash around the crevices of his brain before he hums in acknowledgment. “I guess it would make you seem weaker to other people. But the same rule doesn’t apply to us, Yongguk.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I mean,” his blue-haired neighbour, friend, shrugs. “You’re my friend. Letting you know about my embarrassing moments would instead make me stronger because there’s someone to make the ordeal funny instead of painful.”

 

It’s now Yongguk’s time to ponder over Himchan’s words. They are nothing special, because it’s highly cliche. What Himchan just said. But, Yongguk finds himself going soft at the meaning behind the words. You can be yourself with me and I won’t judge.

 

“You know,” he says after a while of unbridled silence. “The reason Daehyun and I are so awkward with each other is because before he dated Youngjae, he and I had dated for a week.” He ignores the look of utter shock on Himchan’s face and continues. “We didn’t really work out and broke up pretty soon. Then a month later, Youngjae brings this guy home to introduce him and I act like it’s the first time we ever meet.” He chuckles at the memory as he continues, “but the fact is, I didn’t even know it was the same guy I had dated.”

 

“No way!” Himchan exclaims sitting up and staring at Yongguk owl-eyed.

 

Yongguk nods his head and muffles a laughter as he continues, “the same night, Daehyun excused himself to the bathroom but instead came to my room and acted all shook and stuff. Demanding to know why I’m acting like I don’t know him and I genuinely couldn't remember him!” He starts laughing again at the memory. “So he pulled down his pants and showed me the burn scar he’d gotten from the popcorn machine when we had gone on a date and Youngjae came into my room at that exact moment!”

 

“Shut Up!” Himchan stutters already bursting into giggles and guffaws. “Don’t tell me.”

 

“And he looked completely horrified and asked Daehyun, ‘how come you never suck my dick!?’”

 

They both burst into another round of loud, gasping, laughs as Himchan declares, “I’m SO using this on those little shits the next time we meet!”

 

“That’s why I told you!” Yongguk affirms as he starts hitting his couch this time.

 

They continue laughing like maniacs till three in the night.

 

*****

 

“Did you change your cologne.” Yongguk asks the man standing a few feet away from him in the library.

 

Himchan turns to him shocked and smiles as he explain, “my usual brand was out of stock so I decided to try this one out.” He then raises his eye and smirks, “how’d you know it was me, though? I didn’t even speak to you and my hair is hidden under my beanie.”

 

Yongguk rolls his eyes and takes the book Himchan is holding from the man. He regards the paperback as he relies, “you’re wearing those channel earstuds that your sister gave you on Chuseok.”

 

He’s not even surprised by now and Himchan simply smiles as he starts discussing the book he’d been looking at.

 

*****

 

They are coming back from the DVD rental shop. Tonight's venue is Himchan’s place and though Yongguk has come to the place only a number of times in the eight months since the man has moved in, he’s well adapted to what’s where.

 

Himchan quickly sets table while Yongguk puts in the movie into the DVD player. “I can’t wait to watch this movie!” Himchan exclaims, as he places the broth he’s brewed on the table mat. “I’ve been putting off watching it since Monday so we can watch it together.”

 

Yongguk’s heart skips a beat at Himchan’s declaration.

 

*****

 

“Have you ever dated someone?” Himchan asks him over dinner one night. They are alone yet again in Yongguk’s apartment.

 

The man looks up from his spaghetti and stops chewing for a minute as he stares at his friend. They’ve known each other for more than ten months now, and Yongguk realizes that this is one thing they haven’t spoken about. He’s always been thankful for that.

 

But, he thinks Himchan deserves to know since the man had told him about his own broken relationship more than three months ago. “I did used to date.”

 

Himchan squints at him as he continues to ask, “how long ago was that?”

 

Yongguk coughs embarrassed and mumbled around his fork. “During college.”

 

It takes some time for Himchan to calculate the time period but when he’s done, he shoots Yongguk a look of utter disbelief. “Eight Years!?” His eyes bulge out and so do his lips. “That’s insane! You haven’t dated anyone in eight fucking years!?”

 

The other shrugs at that and admits in a small voice, “just couldn’t bring myself to trust anybody like that again.”

 

At that Himchan mellows down. He slumps in his seat and watches Yongguk continue to ignore his line of sight. “Why not?”

 

His friend shrugs again as he explain. “I don’t really know.” Yongguk sighs as he pushes away the plate and bites his lips. “I just couldn’t.”

 

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, you know?” Himchan tells him, placing a warm hand over Yongguk’s. And it is the warmth that Himchan extends to him, that makes him want to talk.

 

“We’d starting dating in my freshmen year of college.” He begins smiling at Himchan, who’s started caressing his thumb against Yongguk’s skin. “He was a family friend so he knew about my disorder. He was a senior then so, naturally I didn’t know any of his friends.” He heaves a sigh at the memory of his youth and continues, “we’d gotten physical a month into the relationship and, it was nice.”

 

“I’m sensing a ‘But’ in here somewhere.” Himchan darkly comments. His hands tightening around Yongguk’s.

 

Yongguk chuckles half-heartedly and repeats after Himchan, “but, things were too nice.” He bit the inside of his cheeks, preparing himself for the confession. “I think it was a month after we’d gotten physical that I found out.”

 

He stops at that and Himchan is forced to ask him “what? What happened?”

 

Pain crosses into Yongguk’s eyes as he looks away. “It was a month later that I realized that he wasn’t the only one having sex with me.”  
  
Bewilderment clouds Himchan’s eyes as he tries to make sense of the sentence. “I- I don’t…” He lets his voice fade awayasrealization hits him like a cyclone.

 

“He’d known about my disorder. Used to bring his friends around to have fun with me.” Yongguk scoffs feigning humor in his tone, as he relates to Himchan. “He figured I’d never find out as long as they wore the same clothes as him and had the same hair and smell.”

 

Himchan finds himself at a complete loss for words. He looks like a goldfish, opening and closing his mouth, as he sits staring at Yongguk. Who, to his credit, does an excellent job of hiding his pain. After what feels like a century had passed, Himchan asks, his voice a mere ghost of what Yongguk is used to. “How’d you find out?”

 

“At one point I realized their breathing patterns and sexual preferences didn’t match up.” Yongguk responds lamely. As if he’s given up on acting like he doesn’t care.

 

“H- How many…” But he stops himself. Himchan doesn’t need to know. Actually, he doesn’t think he wants to know. He’s disgusted. Not by Yongguk, but by the ones who would use him like this.

 

Himchan desperately wishes that Yongguk won’t elaborate but like a dam opened after years of drought, Yongguk decides to let it all out. “About five of them. Him not included.”

 

The other man gulps. His throat feels tight. Like a lump of something heavy is stuck in his windpipe. He stares at the man in front of him. Daringly macho. Incomprehensibly hard-faced. And Himchan can see the innocent child behind that tough facade. A nineteen year old boy who was betrayed deviously by someone he trusted with all his heart. His body.

 

“Is that why Youngjae is so protective of you?”

 

Yongguk laughs ruefully at Himchan’s inquiry and shakes his head in denial. He then looks into Himchan’s painfully transparent eyes. “Youngjae…” he gulps. “Youngjae doesn’t know. No one does.”

 

“Wha…” Himchan frowns. Because this makes no sense. “What do you mean no one knows?”

 

Yongguk shrugs as he admits “I never told anybody before today. No one knows, beside you.”

 

Like falling into ice cold water in the middle of January, Himchan’s insides freeze at the information. He’s not exactly sure what he’s supposed to do with it. A tear, falls upon his cheeks and he gulps it back as he asks, “why not?”

 

“Because it’s embarrassing.” Is Yongguk’s quiet reply. Restrained and agonising. As if admitting the little fact hurts Yongguk more than the deed itself. Himchan doesn’t respond to that. He just can’t. So, Yongguk continues with a wry smile. Eyes glistening. “I figured telling you might make the painful memory funny. Cuz you’re my friend.” He bites his lips and turns away, trying to discreetly wipe his eyes. Himchan doesn’t miss it, but doesn’t point it out either. “I don’t think it worked but I do feel better now.”

 

*

 

The incessant ringing of his doorbell is what wakes Yongguk up from his deep slumber. As he walks to the front door of his apartment, he eyes the wall clock in his living room and groans at the time. 3:00AM in the morning.

 

When he opens the door, a man in Hello Kitty pajamas greets him. And had it not been for the fact that Himchan had left his apartment only three hours ago and was sporting his iconic pink hair, Yongguk wouldn’t have known it was him. However, Yongguk does recognise the man and groans once again as he slumps into his front door. “I’m sleepy, Himchan.”

 

“What was his name?” Himchan cuts him off. His voice ringing with urgency.

 

Yongguk raises his eyes and tries to make sense of Himchan’s inquiry. “What?” He stupidly asks back.

 

Himchan rolls his eyes irritatedly and stomps his foot on the ground infurtiated. His Hello Kitty shoes lighting up at the action. “The guy who you had dated. What’s his name?”

 

“Why do you want to know?” Yongguk asks back confused.

 

Another eye roll and groan later. “Just tell me. Please.”

 

“Sh- Shin Dongmun.”

 

Himchan repeats the name under his breath a few times before smiling a cheshire smile at Yongguk, exclaiming “Goodnight, Bang!” and racing back to his apartment.

 

Yongguk is too exhausted to ponder over his friends weird antics.

 

*****

 

“Exactly what do you need my help with in the middle of the night?” Yongguk wonders out loud as he watches Himchan park into the parking lot of some apartment complex Yongguk has never seen before.

 

It’s been three days since Yongguk told Himchan about Dongmun. Three days the man had been MIA and suddenly, tonight at twelve in the middle of the night, Himchan is at his doorsteps asking him to accompany him for some work he needs help with.

 

What exactly is Yongguk to make of this?

 

“You’ll see when we get there.” Himchan whispers, turning off the car and pulling open the glove box. Yongguk watches with unbridled curiosity when Himchan pulls out two black face masks from within it.

 

Yongguk gawks at the face mask thrust into his hands and watched Himchan out it on. “You're not trying murder anyone, are you?”

 

“Just follow me.”

 

*

 

Yongguk is standing in the middle of the apartment but he doesn't know what to do. Himchan is looking at him curiously as he repeats himself once again. “What are you waiting for, Bang? Let's go.”

 

“What do you want me to do?” Yongguk gestures everywhere around him and shrugs at Himchan.

 

Himchan grits his teeth and grabs his shoulders. “This is that bastard’s apartment. Come on, now! Help me trash it!”

 

Yongguk stares back at Himchan with a look of amazement and wonders out loud “why?”

 

To which Himchan bites his lips and smirks dangerously, “because no one shits with my best friend and gets away with it.”

 

Yongguk watches the determination in Himchan’s eyes and doesn't know if he's ever wanted vengeance more than today.

 

An hour later the apartment looks like a hurricane just crashed into it. Himchan had, singlehandedly, ruined the man's vinyl discs by scratching or breaking each and every one of them. He had burned the man's music scores and compositions. Destroyed every USB device in the house. Had actually peed on the man's bed and sofas and probably every piece of furniture Dongmun owned.

 

Yongguk had simply watched in awe how Himchan had painted hateful messages onto his ex boyfriend's walls. His versace suits had been peed on and then shredded. His shampoo and conditioners had been spiked with wasabi. And Himchan made it a task to poke a hole in every single condom Dongmun had in his home.

 

By the time they exited the apartment complex Yongguk was all gummy smiles and Himchan was sweating with the effort of not laughing out loud.

 

*****

 

Himchan had crashed down on his apartment at 6PM exact, dressed as a vampire, begging him to wear his own costume so they can go to Daehyun and Youngjae's Halloween party. Yongguk, had initially refused but of course, with Himchan asking him, soon he had dressed in a simple black cape, calling himself the death reaper. It was not so much of as costume but Himchan seemed satisfied and that's really all Yongguk wanted.

 

When they get to the party, however, much to both Himchan and Youngjae's horror, Youngjae is dressed as a vampire too. Yongguk and Daehyun, who's dressed as zombie, watch the two grown men from behind the cocktail bar battle out who's the best vampire.

 

“I swear they're like ten year olds.” Daehyun shouts to him over the loud music.

 

Yongguk couldn't agree more and screams back at the man, “more like three year olds, actually!”

 

*

 

Yongguk waves the guests away and watches in disgust how his brother and his boyfriend and literally doing the dirty on the living room couch. He rolls his eyes and walks into the kitchen.

 

He eyes the bottles of beer in the fridge and pulls out a carton full of them to down them for the night. Himchan is already lying asleep in the guest room so he takes refuge Daehyun and Youngjae’s bedroom instead.

 

He's watching a soccer match on the television in their bedroom and is so focused onto it that he doesn't even realize that he's on his seventh bottle of beer. By the time he realizes how much he's had, he's drunk. He lets his head lol to the side but manages to stumble towards the television and switch it off. The dryness of his throat makes him go to the kitchen.

 

When he reaches the kitchen, he sees someone standing at the counter making coffee. The man is wearing a vampire costume and looks completely put off. Other than that Yongguk can't really pinpoint who the person is. Having drunk so many bottles already has made his vision blurry.

 

Then man then turns towards Yongguk and his hair isn't pink. “Hey Youngjae.” He smiles and he walks into the kitchen. “For a second I thought you were Himchan.”

 

The man then chuckles and grabbing Yongguk's shoulders steadies him. “I am Himchan, Yongguk.” He says.

 

Yongguk shakes his head a no and pouts as he explains. “Himchan has pink hair.”

 

“I'm wearing a wig, Yongguk.” The man chuckles. Completely amused.

 

Yongguk, however, pouts and ignores the man's words. “And he smells like ink and new books.” He smiles and continues, “And he calls me Bang!”

 

The man, switches off the stove and takes Yongguk's arms in his arm, pulling him towards the guest room. “I think you drank too much, Guk-ah.”

 

“Himchan is really nice, Jae.” Yongguk continues ignoring the man's words. Sighing whimsically. “I really, really like him.”

 

The man pushes Yongguk on the bed and helps him under that covers. “He really, really likes you too.”

 

Yongguk once again, shakes his head in denial. His face contorts in pain and his lips wobble. “Not the way I like him though.”

 

The man smiles and starts patting Yongguk's forehead as he asks, “What's the way you like him then?”

 

The elder looks into the man's eyes. They look awfully familiar. Cattish and sparkling. The dimples near the man's eyes are achingly reminiscent of certain eyes too. But Yongguk can't recall them now.

 

“I want to watch movies with him.” He says. Letting his eyes water. Letting his guards down. “I want to talk to him about random facts and Instruments and his Orchestral Performances. I just want to keep talking to him. For always.” As more tears flow down Yongguk's face, the man wipes them away with a smile. “I really, really like him, Jae.”

 

“Tell him that, then.” The man's voice has turned into a mellow, ripe whisper. Husky and warm. He cards his fingers through Yongguk's locks and smiles at him affectionately. “You should tell him you like him like that.”

 

A fear makes its face known in Yongguk's eyes. One which the man can not ignore. “What if he says no? I don't want to lose a friend.”

 

The insecurity. The sense of abandonment. Every little emotion Yongguk had tried to keep bottled up comes out to haunt him as he holds the man's hands. Weeping into them. “He's your friend. You won't lose him.”

 

“I really, really like him, Jae.” Yongguk mutters as sleep takes over him. Eyes heavier than he can ever remember. “I really like Himchan.”

 

The man, with dimpled eyes and adorable buck teeth, smiles and mutters to Yongguk as he tucks him in. “I really, really like you too. Bang.”

 

*****

 

When the morning light filters through the window blinds, Yongguk winces against it. As he blinks his eyes open an annoying headache greets him. He moves to sit up and that's when his brother sitting on the bed in front of him catches his eyes.

 

Youngjae is smiling almost maniacally at him, holding his cordless telephone in one hand while balancing a tray of greasy pancakes in the other. “Your sister's calling.” He sweetly iterates before shoving the phone in Yongguk's hand and racing out the bedroom.

 

“She's your sister too!” Yongguk groans sticking the phone to his ears nonetheless.

 

Youngjae's call of “not when she asks me to babysit her spawn, she's not!” rings in his ears as he greets his sister on the phone.

 

*

 

“Can I get ice cream?” The little boy in a fluffy baby blue jacket asks Yongguk as they walk hand in hand out of the parking lot of Yongguk sister's home.

 

Yongguk shoots a gummy smile at the boy and ruffles his hair goodnaturedly. “Sure Junhongie. We'll get some ice cream on the way home.”

 

Junhong, his nephew, smiles a toothless grin up at him, craning his neck to stare at the man with admiration. “You’re the best Uncle Gukkie!”

 

“I know!” Yongguk responds back in a shameless, squeak.

 

*

 

“Is this the ‘Bring your personal demons to work’ day?” Himchan asks him as soon as he sees Junhong jumping around on Yongguk's couch. He’s standing in the doorway, looking like a snack but for once, Yongguk isn’t mindfucking him. His attention is diverted by the cute, chubby kid who had been holding Himchan’s hand a second ago, but has now sped through the main door and is jumping on Yongguk’s couch with Junhong.

 

“I’m guessing that’s your nephew?” Yongguk asks as he lets Himchan in.

 

“If you can call him that.” Himchan groans as he tries to get Jongup, his nephew, to stop jumping but soon gives up when Jongup completely ignores him. Turning to Yongguk with a tired face, he plants himself on the ground near the TV and whines to Yongguk, looking none older than the kids. “I like to call him my sister’s way of torturing me.”

 

Yongguk chuckles as he sits down beside the man, watching over the kids who seem to have been pumped with several energy drinks. “How old is he?” He asks, nodding his head in Jongup’s direction. “Junhongie is five.”

 

“Urgh!” Himchan grates and lets his head fall on Yongguk’s shoulder. “He’s six and he’s already riding for Satan’s throne.”

 

*

 

“I want chocopuffs!” Jongup yells at Himchan when he calls him for lunch.

 

Himchan grits his teeth and fists his hand, shaking them above his head. “You’ll eat this chicken rice if it’s the last thing I do, you mutt!”

 

Yongguk watches amused from the kitchen counter how Jongup races into his kitchen with his fake, plastic sword and starts hitting Himchan. Screaming at the top of his lungs. “Die you ugly monster! Die! Die! DIE!”

 

Junhong, who’s securely seated on the kitchen counter with Yongguk standing in front of him to avoid falling, laughs his cheery laugh at Jongup and Himchan’s little brawl. Yongguk scoops a spoonful of the chicken rice in the plastic spoon and presses it against Junhong’s lips, patiently waiting for the boy to finish his mouthful to feed him more. He can’t help but coo at the way the boy’s cheeks bounce up and down everytime he so much as moves.

 

“I am not dying anytime soon, you peepsqueak!” Himchan declares, diving across the kitchen to grab Jongup in a tight lock in his arms. He picks the boy up, holding his arms in a tight grasp and sits him beside Junhong. Heaving when he’s done, he point a threatening finger at the little boy and warns him to, “stay put, or else so God help me, I will throw you in the garbage bin!”

 

“It’s better than being with you!” Jongup sticks his tongue out at the man.

 

Himchan just rolls his eyes, muttering profanities under his breath as he turns to get Jongup the bowl of rice. Junhong then leans down and whispers to Jongup, “don’t be a meanie, Uppie.” And just like magic, Jongup turns quiet. Both Yongguk and Himchan watch in awe how the boy finishes his meal, showing off the empty bowl to Junhong once he’s done.

 

Yongguk falls down laughing at Himchan’s quiet whisper of wonder at the boy’s sudden change of heart. “If I had known he was such a hoe for cute boys in shorts, I swear I’d have started a preschoolers host club or something just to control that little devil.”

 

*

 

“Can Junhongie come over for a sleepover, Himchan?” Jongup asks as they are putting their shoes on.

 

Himchan’s lips curl in an unpleasant frown and he points out to the boy, “not if you keep calling me Himchan. I am your uncle. U-N-C-L-E! Uncle!” He helps the boy tie his shoelaces as he keeps repeating “uncle! Uncle! UNCLE!”

 

Jongup then turns to Yongguk and with a pout in his pink, cherry lips, tilts his head to the side. Looking so much like a puppy dog. “Can I stay over for a sleepover, Uncle Gukkie. Himchan is being a bad person.”

 

“Brat!” Himchan barks at the boy, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him away.

 

And it looks like a scene out of a movie, really. Yongguk can’t help but pull out his cellphone and shoot the dramatically, comedic performance being played out in front of him.

 

Himchan is pulling a very reluctant Jongup out the door, while the little boy cries as he tries to pull his arms of his uncle’s grasp. It’s like Himchan is a Devil pulling an innocent Jongup through the gates of Hell. And what really adds to the drama is Junhong, who seems to think this is all real and is weeping as he pulls Jongup’s free hand, yelling, “leave him, Uncle Channie! Don’t take Uppie away!”

 

And Yongguk could’ve gone on and recorded the whole ordeal for another fifteen minutes but Himchan’s cry of “Bang! Help me out here!” shakes him out of his delighted reverie.

 

*

 

“Can we go buy cereal tomorrow, Uncle Gukkie?” Junhong asks as Yongguk is tucking him in for the night. The elder frowns at the boy’s words and asks him why and Junhong pouts, blushing a peachy red as he hides his face under his comforter. “Uppie likes chocopuffs but you don’t have that. If we have chocopuffs he’ll come over, right?”

 

And honestly, who can ignore those doe eyes, staring back into their souls as Junhong looks hopeful and angelic? Not Yongguk. “Sure, Junhongie.” He smiles, carding his fingers through the boy’s hair as he pats his stomach. “You like Jongup?” He asks with a knowing smile.

 

No one had told him that even five year olds turned shy, so when Junhong’s ears turn red and he tries to squirm away from his hands like a little earthworm, Yongguk’s heart just melts. “Don’t ask me that.” Junhong pouts and Yongguk thinks his heart might go into a cardiac arrest anytime now.

 

“Alright, alright.” He grins at the boy, poking his dimples just like he always does when Junhong is being cute. AKA more than half the time they're together.

 

“Can we buy a gift for him too?” the boy asks shyly after some time as passed. His fluffy cheeks bouncing as he yawns. Sleep stuck to his lids like glue.

 

“Sure we can.”

 

Junhong yawns again and settles closer into Yongguk’s warm embrace. Mumbling against his chest, “are you gonna buy Uncle Channie a gift too?”

 

Yongguk’s ears perk up at that and he waits a while before he responds, “why would I buy Uncle Channie a gift?”

 

Junhong peaks from under the comforter and with one eye close and the other barely open, speaks in all innocence. “Cuz you can’t just tell him you like him without a present.”

 

A frown makes it’s way onto Yongguk’s forehead and he tilts his head as he holds the boy. “Why would I tell him I like him?”

 

Junhong then rolls his eyes and sits up, legs crossed. He folds his arms across his chest - tries to, at least - and stares at Yongguk like he’s crazy. “Cuz it’s stupid to hide it! Uncle Gukkie, you are dumb sometimes.” He gasps after having said that and slaps a hand on his mouth as he apologizes for calling the man dumb.

 

“It’s okay, Junhongie.” Yongguk assures him, smiling as he pulls the boy’s hand away from his mouth. “I don’t mind. But… what were saying just now?”

 

“I was saying” the boy yawns again so Yongguk pulls him down beside him again. Patting his stomach as he continues to speak, “that Uncle Jae always says that if you like someone you should always tell them. No matter what. And that people who hide it are stupid dumbos.”

 

With a pinch of his fluffy cheeks again, Yongguk kisses the boy’s forehead as he chuckles, “and what makes you think I like him?”

 

Junhong yawns a final time as snuggles into Yongguk’s chest as he replies, “you remember how he looks, nah.”

 

*****

 

Yongguk stares at the wine bottle in his hands with the intensity of the sun as he bites his lips. He had taken Junhong out for toys before dropping the boy off at his sister’s place with a promise of taking him to meet Jongup sometime next week. And on the way he’d taken his five year old nephew’s advice and bought a gift for Himchan.

 

Now, staring at the liquor bottle Yongguk is not sure what he was even thinking.

 

So, he stuffs the bottle reading ‘To Himchan’ into the fridge, and decides to forget about it all together.

 

*****

 

A man, wearing orange slippers and a black Chanel hoodie is coming out of the cafe. Yongguk can make out that the man has black hair that shine brown in the sunlight, from across the signal. He can also make out that the man is wearing a pair of sunglasses that make it harder for him to be recognisable. He’s carrying a venti Americano in his hands and is speeding away on the other side of the road. He obviously can’t hear the person nor can he smell his cologne.

 

But even then, Yongguk recognises him.

  
It might be the way the man walks, his tread light and jumpy. Or maybe it’s the way the man runs his hands through his finger, only using the first three fingers. Maybe it’s the way he blows at his coffee, licking the rim before drinking it. Or the way his bites the front of his lips instead of the side. Maybe Yonggukrecognises him with the way he holds his cellphone, in his left hand with his pinky balancing the weight of the device from the bottom. Or the way he lets one earphone dangle with with in ear.

 

Yongguk doesn’t know how he knows it’s Himchan.  


He figures maybe he has more than one quirk when it comes to recognising Himchan.

 

*****

 

When Yongguk rings the doorbell to Himchan’s apartment, he’s pretty sure he was expecting a tall man with exquisite features to open the door for him. Not a chubby, little boy with broken canines and a lollipop in hands. But he can’t say he doesn’t like the sight of Jongup grinning at him like a maniac.

 

“Hi Uncle Gukkie!” The little boy wearing Luffy’s costume, grins up at him. “Are you here to meet Himchan? Where’s Junhongie?” He peeps behind Yongguk’s legs to look for the younger boy, and pouts when Junhong is nowhere to be seen.

 

Seeing the sad look in the child’s eyes, Yongguk crouches down in front of him and pinches his cheeks. “I’m sorry, Uppie.” He fake pouts. “I’ll bring Junhong over the next time I visit. Okay?”

 

Just when Jongup is smiling again Himchan’s loud screech of demon cry echoes through the apartment. “Moon! Jongup!” Yongguk watches Jongup’s angelic smile turn into a Satanic smirk. “How many times have I told you to not open the door without asking me first!?”

 

Yongguk sees Himchan streaming out the apartment and in that moment Jongup pushes his leg out. Himchan, obviously doesn't see it and falls head first in the doorway. Had Yongguk not been there, Himchan’s beautiful face would´ve turned bloody.

 

His friend falls directly into his arms and like a romantic movie, time goes still for them. Jongup sticks his tongue out at his Uncle and races into the apartment but neither Yongguk nor Himchan make to follow him.

 

They are stuck. In the awkward embrace that feels a little too comfortable. Himchan’s knee is sitting between Yongguk’s thighs. Yongguk’s hand is resting on Himchan’s hips. Pleasantly surprised, Yongguk smiles internally at the fact that Himchan isn’t as slim as he’d expected him to be. He’s got a healthy amount of muscle underneath the lime green sweater he’s wearing. Cakes. That’s what he smells like. Yongguk can almost smell the vanilla flavour wafting off of Himchan.

 

The dreamlike state they are in soon broken by Jongup yelling, “Himchan~” through the apartment. Running out in just his underwear.

 

*

 

“I don’t care if you hate Mrs. Shin hair Jongup” Himchan drones as he pushes the alphabet’s textbook closer to Jongup. “You have to finish this homework no matter what. Your mother is going to kill me otherwise.”

 

Jongup huffs cutely and crosses his arms across his chest. Yongguk eyes the two uncle-nephew pair as he Jongup adorably pouts, “but she really has bad hair, Himchan!”

 

In a tired sigh, Himchan corrects him, “uncle Himchan” and places the boy’s pencil in his hands. “And what does her hair have anything to do with doing homework she gives you?”

 

“If I stop listening to her she might get embarrassed and change her hairstyle.” Is Jongup’s innocent reply.

 

Yongguk guffaws loudly out at that and falls to his side clutching his stomach. Himchan whines to his entire apartment, “I swear he’s too devious to be a child!”

 

*

 

Yongguk is helping Jongup change into his night clothes while Himchan warms the chocolate when the little boy gestures at him discreetly. “Psst!” He whispers like they do in cartoons, looking awfully like a mischievous imp. When Yongguk leans down, hugely amused by the boy’s antics, he grabs Yongguk’s broad shoulders and murmurs into his ears, “are you here to tell Himchan you like him?”

 

The man’s eyes turn owl-eyed. He gapes at the boy giggling impishly behind his tiny, little, chubby hands. “Wh- what?”

 

“Urgh!” Jongup groans and places his hands on his hips, trying and failing to look serious. “Don't be a dumbo, Uncle Gukkie!”

 

Raising an eye at the blatant disrespect, Yongguk pinches the boy's ear and chides him with a fatherly smile, “Don't be rude, Uppie!” When the boy apologizes in a whining tone, Yongguk eyes him curiously and asks him the same question he’d asked Junhong the night he’d stayed over. “What makes you think I like him though?”

 

Jongup rolls his eyes and hotly expresses with his hand still on his hips, “I’m not blind, Uncle Gukkie!” He blows his hair out of his eyes and sassily continues, “you always laugh at his jokes and you help him clean his apartment. And last time when we came over, you even wiped his spoon for him before giving it to him. And when he sat on your lap you didn’t push him away even though he’s a fatty! And you’re always smiling when you look at him!”

 

“And that means I like him?” Yongguk asks with raised eyes, looking utterly perplexed. “And don’t call your Uncle fatty, Jongup!”

 

Completely ignoring the man’s stern comment about Himchan’s nickname, Jongup nods his head as if that’s the most obvious thing the planet. “Junhongie told me on the phone yesterday night!” He relies excitedly, jumping on the bed. “So?” He titles his head to the side. “Are you?”

 

“I- I mean…” Suddenly he’s embarrassed. Yongguk cringes at the fact that the mere toddlers can read him so easily. He rubs the nape of his neck awkwardly as he coughs uneasily. “I mean… Yeah. I- I guess?”

 

Once more Jongup ushers him in for another whisper and when Yongguk leans down, the boy explains to him hurriedly. “If you want him to like you back, then you have to keep complimenting him!” When Yongguk gives him a ‘WTF’ look, Jongup rolls his eyes and continues, “he really likes it when people compliment him. He’ll love you if you tell him nice things!”

 

Before Yongguk has the chance to thank the boy however, Himchan enters the bedroom and Yongguk instead has to discreetly shoot the boy a thumbs up behind Himchan’s back.

 

*

 

“Help me carry those pizza boxes into the living room, Bang.” Himchan says over his back as he’s pulling out the beer case from his freezer. “Oh! And plug in my laptop too, please. I want you to listen to some of the compositions I made last week for the performance next month.

 

Yongguk doesn’t move from where he’s standing behind Himchan in the kitchen. He’s nervously wiping his clammy hands on his sweatpants, gulping back a choked breath every now and then. “Hi- Himchan…” He trails off when Himchan turns around to look at him with a raised eye.

 

“What’s wrong?” Himchan asks him, walking past him and towards the kitchen door. “Why aren’t you carrying them boxes?”

 

The elder gulps once. Twice. His breath comes out in huffs as he cringes under Himchan’s gaze. “I… I wanted to tell you something.”  
  
Himchan hangs back and places the beer case on the counter behind him and frowns as he repeats his inquiry. “What is it, Bang? You sound stressed.”

 

And honestly, Yongguk’s never been good at implying his words. He’s never really confessed to someone so he doesn’t know exactly how to insinuate his words. He doesn’t know that he can’t just flat out tell someone he likes them.

 

“I like you.”

 

Himchan stands frozen. It’s like a freeze frame of the beautiful man and Yongguk curses the day he chose to follow the advice of mere toddlers. Just when he’s about to turn away and excuse himself to wallow in his sorrow in his home, Himchan speaks.

 

“I know you do, Bang.” He smirks. Jerking his head to the living room, he says, “this was really anticlimactic, by the way. Now let’s get go. The pizza will go cold.”

 

“Himchan!” Yongguk yells despite himself. Grabbing the man’s arm he pulls him back and stares into his eyes with a scowl etched into his forehead. “I just told you I like you.”

 

With a pokerface, Himchan replies, “and I just said, I know.”

 

A frustrated growl escapes his lips and Yongguk pulls at his hair exclaiming, “I mean I like you more than a friend! Like I love kind of like you!”

 

“I know Yongguk.” Himchan enunciates slowly back to him. Like talking to a child with a learning disability. “Now let's go.”

 

“You don’t get it, Dammit!”

 

“What do you want me to do?” his friend asks scandalised. He shrugs dramatically and wonders out loud to him, “do you want me to dance or something?”

 

Yongguk flinches at the question and stares back at the man in front of him entirely dumbfounded. He feels like at a complete loss for words. “I- I-” He tries to come up with an inkling of what he might have been expecting, but comes back empty handed. Rather lamely he replies, “I was hoping you’d tell me how you feel.”

 

Himchan just stands there staring at him. And sudden Yongguk, as he stares back into Himchan’s brown eyes, realizes. The man in front of him is gorgeous to the point of sinning. With the most devilish eyes and the most kissable lips. With hair that fall elegantly across his forehead and skin that shines. He’s everything Yongguk’s not, and suddenly Yongguk feels like he is the stupidest man on earth if he expects Himchan to lower his standards for him.

 

And then Himchan moves.

 

The man moves his body close next to Yongguk’s, his knees brushing against Yongguk’s thigh. His chest pressing close to the elder’s. Yongguk’s breath catches in his chest when Himchan leans down bringing his lips dangerously close to his. Eyes still locked into each other’s gaze. Yongguk can smell the peppermint in Himchan’s breath, can feel his heart go into overdrive when Himchan doesn’t stop moving.

 

“Why don’t you figure out what I feel for you for once?” Himchan whispers against his lips. His breath brushing past Yongguk’s waiting lips.

 

And then he kisses him. Light and negligible. The taste of peppermint and cherries, lingering on his lips as Himchan presses him into the counter. The warmth of the other’s body, wafting scarily into his own. Himchan’s hands tangling messily into Yongguk’s hair with a hint of urgency. Like a tidal wave of emotions has taken over him, Himchan caresses his face with the tenderness of an artist.

  
  


As they pull apart, Himchan smiles at him, breathless in all his glory. “Does that answer your question?” He’s smiling that cheeky little impish smile of his.

 

Yongguk, breathless and completely crazed out, nods his head. He feels lightheaded, actually. “A little.”

 

His friend winks at him at that and turns away, pulling the beer case as he enters the living room. Calling out behind him, “I’ll give the detailed answer after we’re done listening to my compositions!”

 

Yep! Yongguk nailed the confession.

 

*****

 

The moonlight filters sinfully through his bedroom’s windows, a cool breeze rifles the sheets that cover his lower body. Yongguk, dazed and completely high on hormones, gazes wondrously at the man lying beside him.

 

He's Godlike, the man who's breathing sounds oddly rhythmic. Like a metronomic pattern that will soon give way to an orchestral performance. His hair, for once, is black; not the perfect jet black but a dirty brown. The man smiles in his sleep, has an overbite, sometimes he sniffles when the cold gets under his sheets.

 

He is beautiful. The most beautiful face he's seen.

 

If only Yongguk could commit the face to memory.

 

He smiles as he cards his fingers through Himchan’s hair and soon sits up in his bed. It’s been three days since they’ve been official and Yongguk doesn’t remember a day he’s been happier.

 

Quietly getting out of bed, Yongguk pulls on his shorts and walks into the kitchen, smiling dreamily at the fact that he’s got a boyfriend. He can’t wait to rub it in Youngjae’s face, knowing well that his brother will throw a hissy fit when he finds out it’s Himchan’s he’s dating.

 

He’s almost done making his morning coffee, when a pair of sturdy arms wrap around his waist. He doesn’t even have to look at the man behind him to know it’s Himchan. The man’s amber scent bombarding his senses. “You want coffee?” He asks, to which Himchan responds with an inconceivable hum.

 

A while wifts away with them standing like that. It’s a chilly morning but Yongguk doesn’t think he needs anymore layers to add to the Himchan blanket he’s in. Though he’ll never admit it for the sake of his own pride. After several long minutes that are too peaceful but appreciated nonetheless, Himchan speaks.

 

“I’d have never thought you’d be into missionary position. Always thought you’d be more of a doggy style.”

 

Yongguk groans against the embrace he’s in and lets his head fall back on Himchan’s chest. His cheeks an apple red. “Can you please not embarass me over this?” He chuckles at the giggles Himchan elicits and whines in a tone so unlike his own. “I haven’t had sex in eight fucking years. I think I deserve to not be made fun of over my sexual preferences.”

 

Himchan rubs his nose into the joint of his shoulders and collarbone. In the little dip he’s found himself so fond of, and continues in his teasing tone, “still. I really appreciate you letting me cum inside of you.”

 

He’s just about to respond on that comment when a loud, shrill voice makes them freeze.

 

Yongguk, still in Himchan’s embrace turns around really slowly, to find both Youngjae and Daehyun in the kitchen’s doorway. Staring at them with eagle eyes, Youngjae’s face scrunches into an unpleasant frown, looking as if he’d just eaten the sourest of limes on earth. “This is disgusting.” He mutters for everyone to hear as he continues staring between his brother and his boyfriend. Both of whom are standing barely naked in the kitchen.

 

Daehyun’s attempt at stabilizing the situation is of no help either when all he can come up with is, “at least now we’re even, huh?”

 

The silence that follow continues for the entirety of their visit but Yongguk still can’t bring himself to curse the day he fell in love with the utterly handsome, dimple-eyed, Kim Himchan.

 

He’s blissfully in love with the man and he can not lie.

 

* * *

Twitter: [@CMiMiU](https://twitter.com/cmimiu) | Tumblr: [CMiMiU](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13474071/cmimiu.tumblr.com/)| Ko-Fi: [Buy Me A Coffee](https://ko-fi.com/cmimiu) 

**Author's Note:**

> Well.... there ya'll have it! The BangHim fic I'd been working on. Please comment on how ya'll liked it! And I know this is not the spinoff I had promised in 'Dare You to Fall in Love' but I still hope ya’ll like it!!!


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